The first guy I went out with was from Tinder. Say what you will about the app, for the 3 or so months I was on it, I found it amusing. The fact that it was completely free as well as required a very minimal profile in the "About" section were two strong selling points, thus why it was the first online dating avenue I turned down. 

Enter Craig - name changed to protect the innocent. Although he wasn't very innocent. 

Craig and I matched or whatever, based solely on a picture. We started "talking" (texting through Tinder) and I found him funny. We chatted about the usual...where we were both from, college (he didn't go), job (waiter), favorite past times (?). 

I was somewhat hesitant based on his credentials. Now, education is important to me, but it is not a deal breaker. College isn't for everyone, as he said maybe 6-8 times during the course of our date. And, I really don't care what you do for a living as long as you have drive & ambition.

Despite some doubt, I accepted a date after a few days of communicating. I was to meet him at 7 at a restaurant not too far from where I live. 

I waited outside for Craig. He showed up on time (I was early, I always am) and gave me a hug. A hug that hit me like a mac freakin' truck. Not because of his size, but because of the amount of original sent Febreeze he apparently doused himself in moments before. Oh my goodness, it was suffocating.

We sit down. Craig is anxious. Like, jumpy, can't sit still, I am afraid he's going to fall out of his chair anxious. Sure, all first dates are nerve racking, but this was almost over the top. 

Flash-forward two hours later - we order drinks and dinner and conversation goes well, but I'm not feeling it. Nice guy, but not for me. He spit a LOT when he talked. Also, Craig has been a waiter for the past 10 years. So back to that whole drive & ambition thing...

The deal was sealed when he said something along the lines of "yeah so when you meet my family...". 

In all the things to NOT say on a first date, meeting the family is probably ranked up there with "Is your friend in your profile pic single..." and "My ex always used to say...".

I saw Craig once more for a drink. I knew I was done after that. When he asked to see me a third time and take me golfing (ha!), I more or less said I didn't think we were in the same place. I thought that was a nice way to end things. 

Apparently not. 

A week later, I am running Saturday errands with Ann Claire at TJ Maxx. I am waiting at the front of the store while she pays and in walks Craig. Holy crap. I didn't think he saw me, but I left AC and bolted to the car anyway. 

Turns out, he did see me and he let me know in the creepiest way. I received a text. "Hey! Were you just in TJ Maxx? I know I saw you but didn't want to startle you." 

It didn't stop there. 

Later that same day, he sends me what was most definitely a fake message. "Hey! Can't wait to see you tonight. I'll pick you up around 6 or so?" immediately followed by a "Oh, sorry, that wasn't meant for you."

Are we 32 or 12? Who does that?

I thought for sure Craig would finally disappear, what with his hot date that night. But, no

I'm enjoying brunch at a cozy, quaint restaurant on the east side of town one winter Sunday. Read, winter. We went out in July. 

That night, I get a text from Craig asking if it was me he saw that day at this particular brunch spot. Again, he didn't "want to scare me by saying hi." 

Craig, I think we are all past the point of you scaring me. 

I didn't respond, and haven't heard from him since. 

Is this thing still on?

I can't imagine any of you are reading this after my three year hiatus, but, here I am. Chalk it up to social media making it quicker & easier to post those random moments that seem to be plotted along the road map that is my journey.

Recently, I've had a string of occurrences in my love life that were just down right ridiculous. I shared with friends, but never thought about writing them all out. 

Until now, that is. 

Let's back things up a little bit. I decided to do online dating a year or so go. There was no real reason that I didn't begin earlier than I did. It has worked for a number of my friends, even taking several of them down the aisle. For whatever reason, I was hesitant. Maybe I was too lazy to fill out all those questionnaires. Maybe I was fearful I would meet a mass murdered. Or maybe I thought I would get stalked at TJ Maxx. Which I did. 

So, for those still listening, the blog is coming back. Be patient as I recount these stories and try to pen as many details as I can. But trust me, they are coming, and I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I (almost) enjoyed living them. 

You can't make this stuff up. You just...can't.

short and sweet

These three things stole my heart this weekend.

Eric Church, Luke Bryan (whew! hothothot), and the best, most expensive ice cream I have ever had.

Not so Goodwill

It's been a while, friends... life has been good. No complaints. But also, nothing significant enough to write about... until now!

A while back, a Facebook "friend" posted that they had just returned something at the Dollar Store. I giggled, and then thought to myself - would I do that? Probably not. I love a deal. I use my coupons and almost never buy anything full price. But I don't know if I'd go as far as to take something back that cost me less than the gas it would take to get there.

Through my "thrifty"ness, I've also grown to love Goodwill, thrift stores and garage sales - more for the kitschy items mostly. I go from time to time, usually when I am bored - but my stop yesterday at Goodwill was not to buy, but to give. I had a bag of various items that I took to their drive-up donation center. As I was getting out of my car, a young teenage girl stopped me.

" 'Cuse me...my momma wants to see what's in your bag." I looked up to find a tall, slender woman in a maxi dress, wearing huge sunglasses and equally huge hoops. I looked further past her to see she had just stepped out of a silver Mercedes.

I was hesitant, and very confused. I opened up my bag to show her a mixture of scarves, cookbooks and picture frames that was my trash, and hopefully someone else's treasure. She reached her hands down in the bag, moved a few things around, but ultimately decided she wasn't interested.

"No, no I'm looking for notebooks."

At this point, I really didn't know what to say. What if I had a notebook... would she have taken it? Given the money to me? To Goodwill? Or offered money at all?

Was she going to Goodwill to shop for notebooks? Because I am pretty sure they are all of $1 at the CVS up the street. Brand spankin' new ones.

The whole scene, which was all of 60 seconds, left me completely baffled. I guess people that drive $60,000 luxury vehicles like their deal as much as the next person.

But please, don't take from charity.

my virtual closet

Online shopping is one of my guiltiest pleasures...even if it is just for fun and I know in the end, I'm too cheap to buy it anyway. Here are some of the things for spring that are currently waiting patiently in my virtual shopping bags.


stripes are so fun!



loving these colors...a great dress to wear to a wedding, out to dinner or on your beach vacation



a spring standard that you can take in to the fall with a burnt orange cardigan or scarf

i live in flats, and these bright orange ones will go with more than you think
cute weekend top that's easy on your wallet

questionnaire

It has been a LONG time since I last blogged - too long! Lots of things have been going on that have taken my time and energy away from this blog and writing. But the one good thing about it is it's always here when I just want to pick back up and start fresh!

I thought I would pick up where I left off with this fun little survey a friend sent me to fill out. I remember doing surveys all the time when I was a teenager and they were sent almost daily to my AOL email. I don't know why I thought they were so fun, but I did. Maybe I was just a nerd. And still am.

So here is another one for old time's sake!

TEA OR COFFE

unsweet tea, extra lemon! i drink it like water

I COLLECT...

stationary and vintage jewelry/purses/hats

FAVORITE CITY

chicago

SPRING OR FALL

winter :)

BLOOM OF CHOICE...

big, bright red tulips

CHINA PATTERN

never really had reason to think about it, but if i had to choose it would be something very, very plain

STYLE ICON

jackie o

FAVORITE FRAGRENCE

miss dior cherie

I'M LUSTING AFTER

this, that, and those

MOST PRIZED POSSESSION...

a signet ring that was my great-grandmothers, my pearls from my mema, and a cocktail ring made of my grandmother's earrings

GIRL CRUSH

betty white, miranda lambert

BOY CRUSH

brad paisley, blake shelton, ryan reynolds...was i suppose to pick just one?!

ON WEEKENDS, I...

love to sleep, clean, wine, dine, shop, bake, re-charge and wear no makeup

FAVORITE CUISINE

tossup between greek & mexican

I WEAR ___ ALL THE TIME

cardigans

FAVORITE COCKTAIL

cold, dry white wine

Today I switched over to my 2012 planner. Yes, I still use a hand-held, paper planner. And as long as they are around, I'll still use them. I write everything in my planner. If I ever lose it, I'm screwed.

Before tossing in the trash, I flipped through it for memories sake. It reminded me of all that 2011 has brought me...and while there have definitely been some hills to climb, many blessing have also been sent my way.

So true to the nature of many blogs this week, and David Letterman, here are my Top 10 Moments of 2011.

10. Saw Brad Paisley in concert 3 times this year!
9. Second Tuesday of every month - my supper club - love those girls.
8. Took a new position at work in July...still really enjoying it.
7. My 10 year high school reunion happened and it was SO MUCH FUN!
6. Obviously went to my fair share of weddings. Even got picked up by a 65+ year old at one. No thanks.
5. In May, there were three precious babies born within 5 days of each other - Eve, and twins Lily and Jackson. They are all angels!
4. Sarah and Whitney moved back to Nashville!
3. Took a trip to the beach in March with my family.
2. Traveled to California and Washington to see Carla and Tori this summer. Saw so many things I'd only seen before in pictures.
1. More or less forced myself to meet Blake Shelton on a random street corner one Wednesday night. I had no shame...and he was awesome.

I'm off to the beach with friends to ring in 2012... Happy New Year to you all!